Tomorrow, Monday March 29, at 2pm we will start our homestudy to finalize the adoption for our youngest daughter. We have already been through two of these, but it just makes me nervous and edgy.
Just remember us, and pray that we stay calm and all things go well.
No problem! Prayers on the way to the Big Guy as we speak.
Btw, I know you'll do just fine. You must be very fine people to have made it this far so keep your chin up and smile :)
we will think good thoughts!
Prayers on the way, what a noble thing it is you are doing. Please keep us informed .....
By the way, what is a homestudy ?
Hey there Sunshine, we just know in our hearts it WILL ALL go really well--I mean, this whole gang of us will be offering up our prayers for you and your daughter! And surely the angels and archangels will be on our side-- even THEY arent brave enough to stand off a whole caravan of pop-ups storming Heaven's Gates. where we'd all be clamoring to serve as character witnesses --EVERYONE in heaven as well as earth knows that PUT campers make WONDERUL parents! :S
Hey, if this is your third time through a homestudy, you should have no problems. Your home should be a lot safer than most homes out there, with everything where it should be, no chemicals or cleaning products down low, or under the kitchen sink(I still can't believe how many people still keep them there), child locks on cabinets, covers on all electrical outlets, gates on all stairs, and generally a clild proof house.
We've been there twice, so know how stressful it can be.
You will be in our thoughts and prayers.
Everything will be fine. Prayers are going out for you and your family.
No worries, everything is going to be just fine. You are all in my heart.
T
;)
They will breeze right thorough it !
Quote from: wiininkweNo worries, everything is going to be just fine. You are all in my heart.
T
;)
With being through it before, I'm sure you will be fine. Relax!
Well the first visit is over with, and all went well. I don't know why we stress ourselves out like we do, but we do. Karen, our social worker, was great. She just ask the usual questions, toured the house, and made a bunch of notes.
And your thoughts and prayers must have worked really good, because she said this would be one of the easiest adoptions she had ever done since our middle and youngest daughters have the same birth mother. PLUS, it maybe a possibility that they might not charge us the full price because of all the information from the previous homestudy, some could be used on this one.
Right now we have to wait the 30 days for the advertisement for the unknown father, to terminate his rights. That started last week, one down and three to go.
Thanks again, and I will be sure to keep you informed.
Told you so, breezed right thorugh it :!
Sunshine, I am so happy (can you hear the cheers from all your PUT friends? ) for you and DH and your DD's that all went well. But then, none of us here are the least bit surprised. Going to keep my fingers crossed and light some candles that the sperm donor will stay out of the picture and give this little girl a chance at a happy life with you and the rest of her "real family." :)
I hope he will stay where he is, oblivious to the fact that he has a daughter ...and let the little darling have a chance at a happy normal life ....
Remember, we were thinking of adopting a little girl some time ago ? Children's aid society gave them temporaily to the custody of the grandmother (mom's). GM rented a unit in the same apartment where her daughter (children's mom) live promptly, and they all ended up physically with their mom, who does drugs and some other stuff .... She had promised to call us and let us know what is going on with her and stuff, but of course nothing .. we are just hoping that she is ok.
Sometimes parents do not provide the best or the minimum care for their own children, they are much better with loving caring families. I am sure three weeks will pass by and we will just see pictures of your newly expanded family :)
Quote from: NightOwlSunshine, I am so happy (can you hear the cheers from all your PUT friends? ) for you and DH and your DD's that all went well. But then, none of us here are the least bit surprised. Going to keep my fingers crossed and light some candles that the sperm donor will stay out of the picture and give this little girl a chance at a happy life with you and the rest of her "real family." :)
We have our second visit from the social worker on April 23. She is coming to see Tori, how she reacts with us and just observe her.
About the birthfather, birthmother actually knows who he is and has told him but he did not want any responsibilities and had since moved to CT and she will not tell. The last advertisement for unknown birthfather will be May 7th. (figured out who it was when it became obvious that Tori was bi-racial) Birthmother has four felony drug charges against her, grand theft auto, and writing thousands of dollars of bad checks on some mans account. So we have always felt safe that they (the birthparents)would not take her away, but it was just the problem of the finances to pay for the homestudy since we were already having other financial woes.
It has been really great knowing that people on own our side, the day care lead teacher and some others said that they would hold a hot dog sale to help us pay for it because it would kill them if she was taken away. PLUS, having all of you helping with your thoughts and prayers, Really lets us know how rich we are with all of the support.
Thanks for everything, and we will let you know more after the next visit.
So when do they decide ? right after the second homestudy ? That will be a day after my birthday, I am sure it will bring good news for you and her :) Keep us posted please :W
I am not sure how long it will take, this is the first time we have used the Dept of Social Services to do the homestudy. I know that it can not be completed until after the last advertisement for unknown father which will be the first part of May.
So, one more visit and advertisement and that is it or is there more stuff which you have to go through ?
Glad the first part went well. Keeping you in my prayers for the rest of the process!
Quote from: NCSunshineAbout the birthfather, birthmother actually knows who he is and has told him but he did not want any responsibilities and had since moved to CT and she will not tell. The last advertisement for unknown birthfather will be May 7th. (figured out who it was when it became obvious that Tori was bi-racial) Birthmother has four felony drug charges against her, grand theft auto, and writing thousands of dollars of bad checks on some mans account. So we have always felt safe that they (the birthparents)would not take her away, but it was just the problem of the finances to pay for the homestudy since we were already having other financial woes.
Hi NC!
Congrats on making it thru the first visit for your HS. I'm an a adoptive mom too and I also work for an adoption agency here is So Cal. Even tho you've been thru the HS proces before, it still can be nerve-wracking! Just keep remiding yourself that the HS process is 20% screening and 80% eduction to help you be a better parent to your kids. They're really not trying to "get" you.
I hope the time for the unknown BF goes quickly. But I did have a question--since your bmom knows who the BF is, does the state plan on giving him notice as well? I don't know what the law is in NC, but here in California, if a bmom knows or even suspects that the BF may be a particular guy, he has to be given notice of the adoption so that he has the ability to either consent to the adoption, waive his parental rights, or (hopefully not) assert them. If he weren't given notice, he could possibly be able to come back years down the line and seek to overtturn the adoption. I'm not trying to worry you, but our son's adoption was contested by his BF and I would hate to see that happen to anybody else because proper procedure wasn't followed.
You are most definitely in our prayers. Please let us know how things go on the 23rd!
Hey there, NC:S
We're all hoping for good news that the BF will not have any interest in this whole thing and will either waive or stay out of the picture entirely.
I've always thought that true Parenthood is a matter of the Heart and Soul, not of the gonads!
Do keep us posted so we can celebrate with you :)
Birol, we still have criminal background checks to have done, and medical checkups about our health and Tori's.
Griffsmom, since she will not reveal to anyone who he is, the only way to do it is unknown BF advertisement. Plus she did tell him but he had no interest, so we might could use that as evidence that he knew but did not want her if something should come up later.
I think that the stress of HR Block coupled with the Homestudy and attending college full time just about did me in. Thank God working at HR Block ends Thursday April 15th!!! (it is very stressful at the end of the season)