OT -- Funny t-shirt sayings

[angelsmom10]

Thought I have a little fun with an email I received -- what has everyone else seen or HAVE!!!
 
Washington Post columnist runs a column each year listing interesting T -shirts observed at the Ocean City, Maryland.

(Glo, pay attention to the 4th one!!!!!!)

I childproofed my house, but they still get in.

60 is not old, If you're a tree.

I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes.

At my age, "getting lucky" means finding my car in the parking lot.

My reality check just bounced.

Life is short, make fun of it.

I'm not 50. I'm $49.95 plus tax.

Annapolis--A drinking town with a sailing problem.

I need somebody bad. Are you bad?

Physically pffffffft!

Buckle up. It makes it harder for the aliens to snatch you from your car.

I'm not a snob. I'm just better than you are.

It's my cat's world. I'm just here to open cans.

Earth is the insane asylum of the universe.

Keep staring....I may do a trick.

We got rid of the kids. The cat was allergic.

Dangerously under-medicated.

My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash, and it's gone.

Every time I hear the word "exercise,"   I wash my mouth out with chocolate.

Cats regard people as warm-blooded furniture.

Live your life so that when you die, the preacher will not have to tell lies at your funeral.

[B-flat]

Here's one:

By the time I learned to live the good life,
Most of it was already behind me.

[birol]

By the time I learned right from wrong
I had done so much wrong
It didn't make any difference
To learn the right from wrong



Disclaimer : I read this somewhere[/size]

[LoadedCamera]

My personal favorite, since I wear this shirt often!!

 
people like you are the reason people like me need medication

[AustinBoston]

On a T-shirt given to me by family:

I'm not opinionated,
I'm just
ALWAYS RIGHT


On a T-shirt worn by DD's boyfriend:

I'm only wearing black until
they make something darker



Austin

[brainpause]

Under a graphic of v-fib (BAAAD heart rhythm):

"It's not nice to FIB!"

Larry

[B-flat]

I'm with Stupid

(arrow pointing toward Stupid)

[DiW]

We usually give my DH tee shirts to reflect his stern look and grumpy personality. Some of his shirts read:

Do I look like a people person? (kids' favorite)

I'm your father,
not an ATM      (gets the most attention from other fathers)

Out of my mind,
back in 5 minutes

and of course, his Halloween shirt (his concession to getting dressed up)
     I don't do costumes
 


Some of my 11yr's favorites:

       WARNING
     Irish Temper
         and
German Stubborness

  TALKING
is my favorite
  subject

  always
   up to
something

Scooby doo shirt
Here comes trouble (on front)
There goes trouble (on back)

Yeah...
I play like a girl
You got a problem with that?


Diane

[julecav]

There's one I've always wanted to get for DH's grandmother
I'm talking and I can't shutup.

My favorite for Jay AKA Bubba is from walmart they have a line called Bubba Wear  It has Work Shirt and fake dirt spots on it so the real ones blend in.

[jpreiser]

Age does not matter unless you are a cheese!

[labontefan]

"People who think they know everything are very annoying to those of use who do!"

"I can only be nice to one person a day.
Today is not your day.
Tomorrow doesn't look good either."

 

[B-flat]

It's hard to be humble
when you're as great as I am
 
(This one was actually on a plaque a co-worker received. She fit the personality exactly. :rolleyes:  I later saw the same thing on a t-shirt in a store.)

[diggescampin]

it's only funny until someone gets hurt...then it's hilarious