My turn to vent

[Starryart]

I have been off the boards for a while, so I guess it is my turn to vent.
3 weeks ago my Dh lost his job of 23 years. DuPont sold out their textile plants to Koch Industries and Koch started cutting jobs(evil Charles Koch!). My DH is devistated. He was led to believe his job was pretty secure but he was lied to. BIG SURPRISE (sarcastic tone here) Now he is lost and grieving. He is 48 and starting over again. I am trying to be as supportive as I can but I am also in distress as we just moved our daughter (our only child) off to her college this weekend, so now my baby is gone. Much sorrow..... This has been a bad month so far...lost job, money is very tight, kid starting college and moving away.
I keep trying to count my blessings- I still have my teaching job (which I am struggling to do since school started this past week- junior high kids are tough to take on a good day, much less...), our house is paid for, no one is ill, so I know we don't have it as bad as some but it hurts just the same. The future is a lot scarier now.
I keep thinking that we will wake up and things will be the same as it was a month ago.......fairy tale land

[Acts 2:38 girl]

I hate when they lead you on to believe your job is safe then lay you off.  I guess they figured they would save him the stress.  But you looking in the right direction as you count your blessings!  Unemployment is nothing when compared with a fatal illness of someone you love.  It's so important to be thinkful for that.  
 And you house is paid for, which is also another HUGE relief.  We have been struggeling for months now to keep ours - came SO close to losing it.  Now that we are getting our head above water, it is the biggest releif.  We'll pray that you DH gets a better job real soon.  It's a real ego-killer for a man to lose his job and feel like he can't take care of his family.  Hopefully he'll get a job that he really loves!

[gsm x2]

Starry---good luck---you have many many blessings to be thankful for.  I hope that this bump in the road isn't too serious.

Scott

[labontefan]

Back in 1994, I got laid off from my job of almost 17 years. I knew the company was having some hard times and that some of the mines were closing down. (It was a coal company.) However, we had always been told that if the mine where you worked was still open, your job was OK. Surprise! They decided to give my job to the Admin. Assistant at one of the mines that was shutting down. Not sure why since I always got great evaluations. She did have slightly more seniority than me, but seniority didn't mean too much in non-union positions.

They told me about 2 weeks before Christmas that December 30 would be my last day. Merry Christmas.  

Fortunately, I did get 6 months severance pay. Unfortunately, I was unemployed for over 8 months. I was 44 at the time, so I was faced with starting over when I had planned to stay at that job till I retired.

When I finally found a job, it was at about half the salary I had been making and I had to drive 100 miles round trip every day. It was a pretty good company and I loved my boss, but after awhile the drive really started to get to me. I eventually moved back in with my parents to help with finances (and to help them out since they were both in their 70's).

My story has a happy ending! About 6 years ago, I saw an ad in the paper for a company called Crutchfield (that I didn't know anything about at the time). They were opening a new call center about 10 miles from where I lived. I applied and got the job!

I observed my 6-year anniversary on June 29 of this year. It's a great company to work for, and my coworkers are the best. And, I'm finally back to about the same amount of income that I had prior to getting laid off.

Obviously, it was not an overnight fix since it's been almost 10 years since I got laid off. But I have a job I like with a great company so it is a happy ending.

Your DH has all my sympathy...been there, done that, no fun at all!    But tell him not to give up. Somewhere there's a good job just waiting for him. I wish him (as well as the rest of your family) the best of luck!

(BTW, back many moons ago, before the job with the coal company, I taught school--also at a junior high--so you definitely have my sympathy as well!!   )

[SkipP]

I have been off the boards for a while, so I guess it is my turn to vent.
3 weeks ago my Dh lost his job of 23 years. DuPont sold out their textile plants to Koch Industries and Koch started cutting jobs(evil Charles Koch!). My DH is devistated. He was led to believe his job was pretty secure but he was lied to. BIG SURPRISE (sarcastic tone here) Now he is lost and grieving. He is 48 and starting over again.

Starryart, I'm terribly sorry to hear of you husbands plight. I work for Invista so I know exactly where you're coming from.

[Starryart]

Thanks guys for all your support. It really does help to talk to others. I feel like I'm being pulled in so many directions. DH is trying to be brave but he is riding the emotional roller coaster and that is hard on everyone.
It's just like Act's girl said, he feels like he can't support us ( hasn't gotten his first unemployment check yet either- should be soon I hope) so we live off my teachers salary. Now I am the main supporter. I was planning ro retire in five years but not now....SIGH! It is depressing.

Let's see....think positive...count blessings....
One good thing...our camper is paid for too, so that is a keeper. YEAH! We will need that for our escape from reality. Cheap getaway. SP is only $14 a night- we can do that at least.
Thanks everyone. Your the best bunch around.

[Camperroo]

Unfortunately we've been down the laid off route a couple of times over the last 15 years.  You will get by really and your husband will find something in time, maybe even start up his own business in something he's always been interested in???   Not his fault he got laid off and he's been a solid contributer to your family for years, so he should in no way feel as if he is failing somehow now.  It's fortunate you've got a good job and can keep things going somewhat and your house is paid for...that's cash in the bank, if you had to sell and pocket any equity you can and move on to a new life adventure.   Don't let hubby get bogged down by the negatives, instead focus on what he can bring that is positive in the situation.  My DH's company has been laying people off left and right over the last several months.  We've already formulated a backup plan just in case, especially since we hope to move out of the area in the next few months.   Sometimes unexpected change can bring about good and positive things, you just have to learn to step outside the box a bit and think about what you want to really do and then go out and try, try, try.

[Starryart]

Thanks Camperoo! That is good food for thought. I'll share your message with DH.

[Wild Wild Qwest]

We hope things work out for you and your family.

I just went to an on-line seminar to Outsource Proof Your Career. The one point I took away was that we all need to be more creative. Too many of us feel that no one can do my job, they'll never get rid of me, etc. We need to have a special talent at our jobs, and be able to do something that not everyone can do.

Good luck!

[MommaMia]

I, myself haven't been laid off, but deciding 8 years ago (my God has it been that long?) when our first DD was born, to become a stay at home mom, was almost like getting layed off... just by choice.  I used to be an orthodontic assistant.  Made good money too.  But since we have become a one income family I know what it's like to have to watch every $ spent.  Now we have 3 kids and sometimes it's a struggle.  

But there are good points to not having to punch a clock everyday.  You have more freedom to do things at your leisure.  If I were your DH, I would consider taking this time to do something he's always wanted to but couldn't because work got in the way.   Travel a little maybe.  See places you have always wanted to.  Take some classes... even if they are fun ones like photography, photography or maybe cooking classes.  (That would certainly be something you both could get enjoyment out of!)  You never know, you might find a new calling.  

Like other said... think outside the box.  And when job hunting, leave no stones unturned.  Sometimes lurking under the most boring looking stone you can find a tiny seed waiting to see the sun for the first time... waiting for it's chance to grow.

Good luck!  I'm sure things will work out.