Psst! Consipiring to convert a camping wimp

[paspilot]

Hi Everybody!
I've been reading up on everyone's XM radios, birthdays and TV fame here, all the while trying to figure out how to 'convert'  my 'camping wimp' wife, Reiko.

Perhaps you saw her come out of hiding at Pismo last year...
Large crowds are not her thing- so Pismo isn't on the agenda this year.
I did learn a few things at Pismo.
   1. She's happier with hookups.
   2. Even with nice and friendly neighbors- that was too close.
   3. Thermally, she's a wus, too hot, too cold not a happy camper.
   4. She's not keen on the potty in the camper and needs really clean facilities...
   5. Grabbing that pizza and bringing it back to the site was an ideal dinner for her.

Other tidbits:
She liked Malibu state park, except we ran out of water.
Things go better with another family/couple with us, but a rally is too intimidating.  (As much as I love you guys, it will be a while before she's going to deal with you all in any significant numbers...)

I need suggestions for weekend trips at a place with hookups. spaced relatively far apart, where a tenting family would be OK next to us.  I'm thinking nice temperate SD or OC beaches in August, but it's been a zillion years since I've done that.  I suspect it's now a mob scene. The idea here is to coax her out for small doses of pleasant experiences.  Ideas for making camping pleasant for a 'wimp' are also welcome.

Edwin is bugging me to go camping now, (he's not as bad as Dee, who could get therapy by suggesting the right place for me to go) I expect 'just the boys' will go somewhere pretty soon. He can 'help' by cooking mac and cheese now.  We do make sure to have fun without her -and so far- have managed to draw blood on just about every trip somehow. Not a sales point with Reiko.

When is the weather 'perfect' at Temecula?
Something like Caspers Wilderness park with electricity would be ideal too.

I look forward to the suggestions you have.
Thanks for all your help (both here and at the rallies)

Carl  (aka paspilot)

PS. If you think this is nuts, my dentist has a japanese wife too. Both of our wives are refusing to see the dentist and we discuss what we can do to get our spouses in, and what sort of trauma japanese dentist must inflict to get people to be this way. I knew what I was getting into when I got married- in terms of a cultural/language differences. I didn't know it would come out in the form of camping and dentists. It's amusing.

[Dee4j]

Hi Everybody!
I've been reading up on everyone's XM radios, birthdays and TV fame here, all the while trying to figure out how to 'convert'  my 'camping wimp' wife, Reiko.

Perhaps you saw her come out of hiding at Pismo last year...
Large crowds are not her thing- so Pismo isn't on the agenda this year.
I did learn a few things at Pismo.
   1. She's happier with hookups.
   2. Even with nice and friendly neighbors- that was too close.
   3. Thermally, she's a wus, too hot, too cold not a happy camper.
   4. She's not keen on the potty in the camper and needs really clean facilities...
   5. Grabbing that pizza and bringing it back to the site was an ideal dinner for her.

Other tidbits:
She liked Malibu state park, except we ran out of water.
Things go better with another family/couple with us, but a rally is too intimidating.  (As much as I love you guys, it will be a while before she's going to deal with you all in any significant numbers...)

I need suggestions for weekend trips at a place with hookups. spaced relatively far apart, where a tenting family would be OK next to us.  I'm thinking nice temperate SD or OC beaches in August, but it's been a zillion years since I've done that.  I suspect it's now a mob scene. The idea here is to coax her out for small doses of pleasant experiences.  Ideas for making camping pleasant for a 'wimp' are also welcome.

Edwin is bugging me to go camping now, (he's not as bad as Dee, who could get therapy by suggesting the right place for me to go) I expect 'just the boys' will go somewhere pretty soon. He can 'help' by cooking mac and cheese now.  We do make sure to have fun without her -and so far- have managed to draw blood on just about every trip somehow. Not a sales point with Reiko.

When is the weather 'perfect' at Temecula?
Something like Caspers Wilderness park with electricity would be ideal too.

I look forward to the suggestions you have.
Thanks for all your help (both here and at the rallies)

Carl  (aka paspilot)

PS. If you think this is nuts, my dentist has a japanese wife too. Both of our wives are refusing to see the dentist and we discuss what we can do to get our spouses in, and what sort of trauma japanese dentist must inflict to get people to be this way. I knew what I was getting into when I got married- in terms of a cultural/language differences. I didn't know it would come out in the form of camping and dentists. It's amusing.

try Yucaipa Regional park  http://www.co.san-bernardino.ca.us/parks/yucaipa.htm   but check the "average temps" I think after may or June it's hotter than heck out there

[OC Campers]

We liked San Onofre/San Mateo cammpground in San Clemente. Make sure you get a motorhome/trailer only site. They have water and electric and clean bethroom facilities. The sites are pretty spacious and have high shrubs for privacy between each site.
 
I second Yucaipa Regional. The sites are almost too big for a rally but is perfect for someone who wants a little more privacy. Only problem would be summer. Not a "cool" spot temperature wise.
 
Unfortunately, Carl, camping isn't for everyone.  She may never want to go camping but I commend you for taking the kids.  They will love it and remember their special time with dad.  Take lots of pictures and show your wife how much fun the boys are having.  
 
Jacqui

[wavery]

I think that you hit the nail on the head, yourself. Japanese people tend to be perfectionists and hate to show any signs of weakness. BTW, Novocaine is over used in the US and under used in Japan IMO.

The problem may not be with the campsites or camping at all. I would think that she may feel very uncomfortable trying to communicate with people that she doesn't know. It may make her feel inferior in some way. I manage a large apt building in Beverly hills. I have several Japanese tenants and they are all (without exception) my best tenants and very fine people. The problem is, they hate to talk to anyone, for the reason mentioned above. They constantly remark to me, "I'm sorry that my English is not so good". I always tell them that their English is fine (which it is) but they always act embarrassed and uncomfortable.

I don't know what you can do about that (if that's the problem) other than to find a similar couple to camp with. Get her out to the campfire and just let her enjoy. Don't force her to communicate, let her take the first step.

I hope that she decides to go with you. IMHO, going camping without your wife may have it's place, just not for me. I'm the wimp in our family. I'd just spend the entire time missing her .

[endless horizons]

I don't know if you have military benefits but one of the nicest campgrounds I have ever been to is on camp pendelton's Del Mar Beach. The base also has camping at Lake O'neil.

Hope this helps.
Maggie

[griffsdad]

Hi Carl, we miss you guys!!

Vail Lake/Temucula is great from mid May to Oct. However, July and August can be at times very hot. But there is a pool there.
 
Closer to you would be Lake Casitas/Ojai. They have a great water park for the boys. Again mid May to Oct. July, August, and September can be very hot.
 
In Orange County - San Mateo Campground. The beach is close by and you you get in free since you paid at San Mateo. You may want to go in late/April mid or May. This campsite is very popular especially for surfers. San Onofre Beach is one of the best surfing beaches on the West Coast.
 
GriffsDad

[griffsdad]

By the way, Carl we camped right next to your family at Pismo and we met your wife, and she was very, very nice. I hope that she will learn to enjoy camping and maybe sometime in the future camp with our family. I know we enjoyed meeting her. And as always, Griffin enjoyed playing with your sons.

Griffsdad

[paspilot]

Thanks everybody.

Never even heard of Yucaipa. I'll check it out.
I'm also going to try to get a reservation in for San Mateo as soon as I know how all the school schedules mesh. (We got preschool, Mom's school and Edwin is starting Kindergarten this fall) I think San Mateo is closer to her idea of camping.

I'm not trying to change Reiko, really. I'm not sure if Reiko has changed since we had kids or she's just realizing things. When we were dating, we went hiking and I showed her a pit toilet. She thought she could deal with this for a day or two. I should have known better because we also went camping at Capenteria State Beach and we ran off to a gas station in search of cleaner facilities. We did a lot of hiking in the Angeles NF until Edwin was born. We got the popup and the pilot to pull it in '03. In retrospect, buying the popup, is a comical example of how we see things differently.  We see outlets in the PU, I'm thinking that we'll never use those, and she's thinking, I can take my hair dryer. Just about every 'feature' on the PU 'looked' different to us.  

After one of our early trips- dry camping where we emptied the water and zapped the battery, I asked her what sort of expectations she had when we got the PU. She wanted a mountaintop alone with hookups. I was perfectly happy to go to one of those overcrowded dry spots an hour behind our house (Pasadena).  If I could find something closer to what she's looking for, I'd think she would want to go. We did take a hasty beach trip with friends and ended up with hookups and that went well. Pismo was pretty good except for all the happy huggy helpful folks around us. I think it was just a bit much for her to handle on top of her trepidations about camping. She did learn a lot on that trip, one thing was that half the fun was solving problems with what you have, Having all the kids stop by to play with trains while we were tearing down was probably a highlight for her. She did marvel at how everyone at Pismo just got out, introduced themselves and left as friends.  Since that's an alien concept, it'll be a while before  we go to a rally as a family. If and when she's ok with camping, I'll try to coax her to some smaller rallies. She did find the food an attraction to rallies.

As Wavery points out, she intimidates herself on her english. It's good, she's just never sure of herself. I've been encouraging her to take a 'just do it' attitude and since nobody bites, it's been a source of positive feedback. She's wound a bit tighter on the perfectionist traits than most Japanese, but the boys are doing a great job of adjusting that.


Dave, I'm sure at least me and the boys will catch up to you at a rally soon. It's always a pleasure to camp next to you. (I'm pretty sure it's not the other way around with Brian waking up in the middle of the night- yes. still)

Thanks everyone!  Hope to see you all soon.
Carl
Watch superbowl or clean PU. decisions, decisions....
Maybe I need therapy.