Frank Feldman

[campingcop]

A man walks onto the street in New York and manages to get a taxi just going by.
He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank."

Passenger: "Who?"

Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time."
Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to
Frank Feldman every single time."

Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman.  He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis.  He could golf with the pros.  He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano.  He was an amazing guy."

Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."

Cabbie: "There's more... He had a memory like a computer, could remember everybody's birthday.  He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat them with.  He could fix anything.
Not like me.  I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything right."

Passenger. "Wow, some guy then."

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams.  Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good.  He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too - he was the perfect man!  He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman."

Passenger: "An amazing fellow.  How did you meet him?"

Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank.  I just married his friggin widow."

..