DS was subject of female violence ...

[birol]

DS got hit by a girl at school bus ! STOP THE PRESS !!!!

And it hurt  too !

Victim is being taken good care of by his parents !

Guilty party has been suspended from school ! (we don't know how long)

According to our reporters, victim had occupied two seats by putting his backpack and binder on the seat next to him. He was doing his homework at the school bus not to waste time. Guilty party wanted the victim to remove his stuff from that seat, as she wanted to seat there even though there were a lot of other empty seats. The reason guilty party wanted to sit in that particular seat was that across the aisle the boy she liked was sitting, and she wanted to be close to him. Victim refused to remove his stuff stating that there were a lot of empty seats and that he was doing his homework. After a short while convict sat behind the victim, and the victim felt a something hitting the back of his neck. When victim turned back, it was the girl who wanted to sit next to him hitting him.

Victim went to the driver and asked to be dropped off the bus immediately(They were still in school property), driver wisely asked what happened and dumped both of them at the office. Victim was verbally warned not to use bad language (Convict claimed that she was sworn at) and convict has been slapped with a suspension.

And to think that he had asked her out earlier (months earlier and even though she said yes it never happened) , thanks God they never went out, the violence children show these days is scary !

Reported by your reporter

[B-flat]

Birol, In my day and time of growing up it was improper for girls to flirt with boys or to do anything  in the way of touching. Violence was unheard of except for a few boys that might fist fight and get away with it.  My,my, how the world has changed.  If  such activities had taken place at school it would have gone around as gossip about a "loose girl" and the principal would have probably given a paddling.

Well, did DS get his homework done? :Z  :J

[birol]

He finished it home .... The girls today and the boys  are not what we used to be ....

A friend of DD is now officially dating  a boy. They are only 12 for crying out loud ! What are they going to do when they are 15-17 ? Oh yeah, I forgot, there is always alcohol, drugs and streets

I am depressed !

Well, did DS get his homework done? :Z  :J

[B-flat]

When DGS (grandson) was a bit younger & in kindergarten, he got into trouble for kicking the wall of the cafeteria while standing in the long lunch line.  My DD called to tell me about it and exclaimed that she never thought she would be dealing with this kind of trouble.     So I asked if she knew why he had kicked the wall and she said he had told her "because he felt like it."  :J  DGS is sort of a comedian about things anyway.  (hehehe, must get some of that from his Grandma.  

Age 12 is too young to date and some of this is caused by lack of parental supervision.  The other side of the coin is when some parents push to have their kids to be bigger and more important than others.  So peer pressure causes a lot of problems for everyone.  Stand firm on what you believe and pay attention to your children always while they are growing up.  Right now they at times think you are in the dark ages but they will appreciate it when they are much older and do understand that you were bringing them up in the "right way."  Oh me oh my, I am glad not to have young children now as it is very difficult.  DD does take very good care of DGS and DGD and monitors all activities.  She keeps them busy and out of trouble.

[birol]

Talk about peer pressure ... DD is under a LOT of pressure to havea  boy friend. She is one of the few in her class who doesn't do the touch feely stuff with boys. It is disgusting ... Almost daily we have to keep telling her that what she is doing is the normal way to behave. She has just a few friends who think the same out of a girl count of 20 of them. I hope it is not a loosing war.

Anyways ..... Son is now cleaning up his room, because he wasn't an angel himself ! Bare room, just bed, table, sheets etc no fun stuff ......Is it too cruel to make him take everything to the basement ? He was getting to relaxed and lazy himself, missed  a report, got 45-60 out of a few quizzes .... I am not really happy with his general look in life ....... He had a goal of 90+ for his grades and interim report on one of the courses is barely 75 .... Not fun at all ....

[NightOwl]

Birol, sometimes kids get lazy about meeting their responsibilites and we have to do a kind of "boot camp" routine to remind them that  they cant just coast through life. I think you are wise to do this NOW and let him know you are in charge--it will be to his benefit later on.  

Kids who learn they dont have to meet their parents' standards also figure they dont have to meet The Real World's standards either-- and guess what, The Real World doesnt give a rat's *ss about them and slaps them down in a hurry.  Better he learns to  come up to snuff from you than the hard way.

Sounds like the girl on the bus was being a little b*tch, and they can sure do that at that age--all those hormones beginning to rage.

Dating at 12.  Disgusting.   My kids were still playing baseball with boys until  age 16 or 17 like I did--we figured there was plenty of time for romance after they got some education.  

Sadly, we all know neat, really bright  kids of both sexes who end up getting romantically involved too soon, "HAVE to" get married, and then are stuck in deadend jobs for most or all of their lives.

[chasd60]

My 2 cents....... not worth a penny though;)
 
Girl sat next to boy because she had a crush....(boy across the aisle is an excuse)
Boy rejected girl to do homework.....
Girl hurt and frustrated felt like she had to lash out for self-preserverence......
 
Hitting him? Maybe more like trying to wake him up and get him to pay attention to her???
 
Maybe???
 
Just my take with kids that age.

[NightOwl]

chasd60, you clever thing, you--you've come up with a very plausable explanation of  for  what happened to Birol'd DS (devious things, we females are )  In fact I was not above doing something like this myself  except that I was a late bloomer and wouldnt have thought of it at 12.

[Camperroo]

It's unbelievable how easily violent even children become at the slightest provocation.  No one has learned patience or just walking away, it's just "fight becomes I'm right" syndrome.  Another example of people walking around just saying, me, me, me, me.  

As for dating at 12, c'mon where are the parents.  My DD is 14 and a freshman in high school and is not allowed to "date"  The only special event she went to was her Semi-Formal with a "date" but not "dating".  She can also go to school dances but in a group with her girl friends.  She doesn't question our rules and hasn't attempted to skirt around them.  She knows we back up what we say and as parents we stick together in our decisions.  No going out on school nights either.

[chasd60]

chasd60, you clever thing, you--you've come up with a very plausable explanation of for what happened to Birol'd DS (devious things, we females are ) In fact I was not above doing something like this myself except that I was a late bloomer and wouldnt have thought of it at 12.

OK Nightowl, you have me by 2 or 3 years and things changed a lot in that time....I think?? . Not like I can remember at your (my) age!!;)??

[NightOwl]

OK Nightowl, you have me by 2 or 3 years and things changed a lot in that time....I think?? . Not like I can remember at your (my) age!!;)??

chas,  hushhhhhhhhh about that age thing :J      And, yes, I agree, a lot of things have changed since way back when "those times  we cant remember"      

One thing that still hasnt changed, though--refer to Camperoo's post--is that while  it is GREAT for kids 14 or so to "socialize" with the opposite sex like her DD is doing --it is still not good,  for them to be "dating"  or having serious romantic relationships.  It stunts their emotional and intellectual growth and changes the focus of their  lives into an area not appropriate for their age group.  

Okay, gang, so I am a GENUINE DINOSAUER, I freely admit it.   And maybe the way I was raised and maybe the way we raised our girls, and maybe the way the  16 1/2  yo DGD is being raised (same as her grandmother and mom and aunt)  is old-fashioned, but so far it has had pretty darned good  results, at least for our family.

[birol]

Update : she was suspended for three days .....I hope that teaches her that you do not hit other people ...... I told DS to keep away from her and not to get involved in any talk or discussion which involves her.

[Acts 2:38 girl]

Talk about peer pressure ... DD is under a LOT of pressure to havea boy friend. She is one of the few in her class who doesn't do the touch feely stuff with boys. It is disgusting ... Almost daily we have to keep telling her that what she is doing is the normal way to behave. She has just a few friends who think the same out of a girl count of 20 of them. I hope it is not a loosing war.

Let me tell you what we plan on doing with our DD.  She is little, so we have time to plan this right.  When she is about 12 or 13 (before she gets heavy into boys and still thinks Daddy is the only guy in her life) we plan on doing the following:
 
http://www.christianitytoday.com/cpt/2002/001/4.34.html
 
Right now she cares about what you think, Birol!  I bet the other girl might joke a bit, but then be very jealous.  It really takes a Father who cares to single his daughter out and show that this is important to him and her mother.  Otherwise she might think you really don't care about when she has sex, and the only thing holding her back is her own virtue.  You have to do this soon, before she fells in love, because then it really won't have such an impact.  
Good luck with her!  

[angelsmom10]

Just remember Birol, it only gets worse!!!
 
Then they eventually become all grown up and you'll wish they were younger again.

[NightOwl]

Birol, like Andi says, you ARE doing the right thing!   to raise a daughter who does not start this boy-girl physical thing so young.  Make sure she knows she is not abnormal for behaving in a more reserved fashion--she just has higher standards for herself than some of the others do--and it will have many rewards later on.

And BTW, if ALL parents would raise their BOYS  to be aware that  THEY need high standards too, things would be a lot easier for kids as they grow up.  EVERYONE has raging hormones at that age but that is not a license for sexual activity and this is NOT  just limited to Christian religious requirements, but to a whole attitude of valuing one's own self and having self-respect and insisting that others treat us with respect.   The human body IS a Temple and should be treated that way!

KERPLONK  CRRRUNNCH!  (the sound of a Dinosauer  getting down from the soapbox.)