RE: . CAMPING TIPS: (NOT!)

[campingcop]

 
. CAMPING TIPS: (NOT!)
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 *A potato baked in the coals for one hour makes an excellent side
 dish. A potato baked in the coals for three hours makes an excellent
 hockey puck.
 
 *You can start a fire without matches by eating Mexican food, then
 breathing on a pile of dry sticks.
 
 *In emergency situations, you can survive in the wilderness by
 shooting small game with a slingshot made from the elastic waistband
 of your underwear.
 
 *The guitar of the noisy teenager at the next campsite makes
 excellent kindling.
 
 *A large carp can be used for a pillow.
 
 *Check the washing instructions before purchasing any apparel to be
 worn camping. Buy only those that read " Beat on a rock in stream."
 
 *The sight of a bald eagle has thrilled campers for generations. The
 sight of a bald man, however, does absolutely nothing for the eagle.
 
 *It s entirely possible to spend your whole vacation on a winding
 mountain road behind a large motor home.
 
 *Effective January 1, 2000, you will actually have to enlist in the
 Swiss Army to get a Swiss Army Knife.
 
 *Bear bells provide an element of safety for hikers in grizzly
 country. The tricky part is getting them on the bears.
 
 *In an emergency, a drawstring from a parka hood can be used to
 strangle a snoring tent mate

[brainpause]

 campingcop
*snicker*
 
 *Thinking of ways to kill your noisy neighbor makes for great campfire ghost stories.
 
 Larry

[fivegonefishing]

 campingcop
NOT, how can you say NOT, why I ve lived at least 5 of those tips just this year alone,  thanks Harvey, they re cute.